APOLOGY ACCEPTED || 5 Effective Ways to Apologize

We’ve been diving deep into understanding the 5 love languages and putting the pieces together, but what we should be thinking about is the final missing piece – Apology Language.

Miscommunication and misunderstandings have become so common that some of us may not know what or how to deal with the aftermath or how to react at the moment. While we focus all our attention on love languages, perhaps we should also factor in the apology language. Similar to our love language, we also express ourselves when we apologize - it’s not as simple as just an “I’m sorry”. If you can apologize more effectively, reconciliation and forgiveness will be much easier for yourself and your partner, family or friends. 

Let’s take a look at the 5 Apology Languages:

1. Your Regrets

The first feeling, of course, is your regrets. It’s important that the person you’re apologizing to also knows you regret your actions. Express your apology by explaining that you understand the hurt and that your actions have affected their feelings. The most sincere way is not to justify your action, meaning no “buts”, or push the blame onto someone else. Take full responsibility for what you’ve done and genuinely express that to him/her. 

Don’t justify your behaviour when your goal is to give a sincere apology.

2. Taking (FULL) Responsibility 

It’s not easy to be the one at fault, but the truth is, you should take full responsibility for your actions and behaviour. The person accepting your apology would expect nothing more than you admitting your faults. Begin with, “I was wrong, and I have no excuses.” - this may sound like you’re digging yourself a grave, but this opener often gives the other a reason to continue to listen. 

3. Plan of Action To Change

Genuine remorse leads to a plan of action to change - a change in your behaviour. Now that you’ve expressed your regrets and have taken responsibility for your actions, it’s time to work on the trust. To show that you are genuinely sorry, you also need to show your willingness to change to avoid the same thing from happening again. This is when you build to regain trust through action as opposed to JUST words.

4. A Replacement

This one is about making things right. The perfect example of this type of apology language is when you’ve broken an item, you either replace it or fix it. Walking away after an “I’m sorry” will just make the situation worse - we guarantee not even the 5 Apology Language can save you on this one. Sometimes, sentimental items aren’t replaceable, so the best advice here is to make it up to the person and fix the situation as best as possible. 

Apologize like you mean it with heartfelt gesture.

5. Ask for Forgiveness

Last but not least, ask for forgiveness. Let the person you've wronged feel in control of the situation and allow them time to process your action, behaviour and apology. Don’t expect an immediate response or get angry if you don’t receive the reaction you long for. Give them space if that is what they need.

Apply the 5 Love Languages and 5 Apology Languages to your loved ones to improve your relationships.

Take a moment to integrate your use of the 5 Love Languages and the 5 Apology Languages. In some ways, they play an equal role in the outcome of a relationship, whether it is your love, family or friend.